martes, 13 de mayo de 2008

FELICIDADES PRINCESA!!

Hoy cumple años mi princesa Magda. Dentro de poco hará trece años que estamos juntos. Fue un 4 de Junio de 1995, el Madrid ganó aquella noche la Liga con goles de Amavisca y Zamorano. Yo me fuí a celebrarlo, y esa noche empezó una relación que al principio era algo confusa, pero que se ha convertido en lo mejor que me ha pasado en la vida. Así que muchas felicidades mi niña. Que cumplas muchos más, todos conmigo al lado, hasta el infinito.





lunes, 12 de mayo de 2008

EL MITO: JOHN HOLMES (30 y tantos...centimetros!)

Lo que veís aquí arriba es la caratula del documental "La vida de John Holmes". Voy a intentar conseguirlo y os lo paso. Su historia es muy intensa. La pena es que no fuera tan larga como su miembro, ya que murió siendo aun joven. Os dejo aquí parte de la biografía de este GRAN actor:

Porn career

"John Holmes was to the adult film industry what Elvis was to rock 'n' roll. He simply was The King."
Cinematographer Bob Vosse in the documentary Wadd: The Life and Times of John C. Holmes.
For the next two years, Holmes and his wife, Sharon, lived quiet, uneventful lives. Holmes found work as a forklift driver at a meat packing warehouse in Cudahay, California. However, the rigors of driving the forklift truck in and out of a large walk-in freezer and repeated exposures to inhaling the sub-freezing air in the freezer after being outside inhaling the desert-hot air caused severe health problems, leading to a pneumothorax (lung collapse) of his right lung on three separate occasions within the period of seven to nine months during the two years he worked there. While recovering from his illness, Holmes frequented a mens card-playing club in Gardena, where one evening, a still photographer standing next to him at a restroom urinal, noticed his extraordinary penis size and encouraged him to do pornography. Initially during the late 1960s, Holmes did magazine work and an occasional 8 mm loop, keeping his work in porn a secret from his wife. This was easier to do in those days; pornography production and distribution were semi-clandestine, there was no mass production of video cassettes or DVDs, and no Internet.
So, while the ad copy for his first few dozen loops rarely named him, those that did usually gave him a name that was nowhere near what his real first name was. In fact, one early "Swedish Erotica" brochure from 1973 has five Holmes loops listed, each of which has a different name referring to Holmes even though it is obvious from his facial features that "Fred", "Dave", "Rudy", "Big Dick", and "Stan" are all the same person. In the early years of his porn career, Holmes was referred to as "The Sultan of Smut".
With the success of Deep Throat (1972), The Devil in Miss Jones (1972), and Behind the Green Door (1973), porn had become chic although its legality was still hotly contested. Holmes was arrested during this time for pimping and pandering, but he avoided prison time by becoming an informant for the LAPD.
In 1973, Holmes' career began to rise with a porn series built around a private investigator named Johnny Wadd. By 1978, Holmes was reputed to be earning as much as $3,000 a day as a porn actor. He starred at a time when personality could compensate for a lack of other aesthetic characteristics, and a certain amount of acting ability was still demanded of porn stars on a level that is not often necessary in today's porn films.[citation needed]
While his vocal inflection was arguably somewhat higher in pitch than one would expect for a "hard boiled private dick", most film critics and fans agreed that Holmes did demonstrate enough acting ability to keep the character of "Johnny Wadd" from being merely a banal, one-dimensional parody of Raymond Chandler's creation, the tough and uncompromising private detective Philip Marlowe. By this time, his use of cocaine was becoming a problem, so much so that it was beginning to affect his ability to maintain an erection.
Also in 1973, Holmes was arrested for pimping and pandering charges when two underage teenage girls, who appeared with him in one of his films, were forced to turn him into the police. However, Holmes was given a choice by his lawyer: plead guilty to the charges and get three years of probation as well become an informant for the Los Angeles Police Department, or plead not guilty and risk being tried, convicted, and given at least three years inprisonment. Holmes chose the former option. For three years, plus a year or so afterwards, Holmes secretly worked as an informant for the LAPD in passing on information about the porn industry to his vice cop contact and handler, Detective Tom Blake, who claimed that Holmes was very helpful in assisting the police with many arrests in order to crack down on the production of adult films.
After his death John was awarded the Life Time Achievement award by the Adult industry. It was accepted posthumously by his godson Sean Amerson, the son of Holmes career-long manager Bill Amerson, who also delivered the eulogy at Holmes funeral services.

Penis size

Holmes' main asset in the porn business was his exceptionally large penis. Holmes' first wife, Sharon Gebenini, recalled him claiming to be 10 inches (25.4 cm) when he first measured himself. However, at the start of his cinematic career, he was widely publicized as having a penis ranging from 12.5 to 16 inches (32–41 cm) long when fully erect. "It is the size of two and one half 6 inch rulers (15inches)," as John Holmes once claimed in a video shoot.
In 2007, it was discovered that the coroner who performed the autopsy on Holmes took "secret" measurements of Holmes' penis in a flaccid state and reported it as being approximately 8.75 inches in length. This information appeared in the form of handwritten notes (scrawled on the back of the third page of the official Holmes' autopsy report) discovered by investigative reporter John Beck who is currently working on a new book about the life of Holmes. The coroner also noted that the size of Holmes' testicles were approximately "the size of a pair of large hen eggs."[citation needed]. Ron Jeremy claims that Holmes was actually 11 inches and used to brag that he was 14 inches.
So celebrated was Holmes' reputed penis size that it was even used as a marketing tool for films in which he did not even appear. In the porn classic Anyone But My Husband, the promotional tag line read "Tony The Hook Perez has a dick so big that he gives even John Holmes a run for his money."[2]
Different attempts to ascertain the actual length of his penis have led to varying results. An American study of video footage of Holmes' penis concluded his penis was 10–11 inches long (25–28cm), whereas another study comparing many pictures of his penis to the estimated measurements of other parts of his own body led to the conclusion of 8 3/4 inches (22cm). Holmes' longtime manager, Bill Amerson, that "I saw John measure himself several times, it was 13 and a half inches".[3] Holmes' last wife, Laurie "Misty Dawn" Rose claims that John Holmes himself claimed 10 inches.
Veteran porn actress Dorothiea "Seka" Patton has claimed Holmes' penis was the biggest in the industry[1], though not all who had sex with him agree.
Regardless of what the actual length of Holmes' penis was, some people question whether he ever achieved full erections on movie sets. Veteran porn actress Annette Haven, for instance, recalled in the documentary Wadd: The Life and Times of John C. Holmes that "as the joke goes, if John ever became fully erect, he'd lose consciousness from lack of blood to the brain because his dick was that big. And it's true that his cock was never hard. It [having onscreen sex] was like doing it with a big, soft kind of luffa."

Number of partners
Penis length was not the only questionable statistic used in connection with Holmes. In 1981, he began to claim that he had sex with 20,000 women. To substantiate this number, and assuming Holmes' first experience with a woman occurred at 16 as he claimed, then he would have had to had sex with 700 different women a year—1.9 women a day—for the next 20 years. More realistic estimates, such as that of Luke Ford, put the figure at around 3,000. Quick estimates based on the number of loops where Holmes did in fact perform a sexual act with at least one woman, allowing for sexual encounters not performed before a camera, and further mitigated by counting a performing partner only once—again, some actresses, such as Seka, Connie "Little French Maid" Peterson, Eileen Welles, Victoria Waters, Linda McDowell, Juliet "Aunt Peg" Anderson, and Desireé Cousteau, made many loops with Holmes in the 1970s—Ford's estimate of 3,000 is closer to being realistic.
According to Holmes' close friend Bill Amerson in the documentary Wadd, Holmes lost track of the exact number of women with whom he had sex. According to Amerson, Holmes became so fervent in spreading false publicity about himself that he also eventually lost track of what stories were true and which were lies; at one point in Wadd, Amerson recalls that early in his career Holmes told the press that a wealthy British socialite paid him to travel to England once a year and pleasure her for twenty-four hours. Later in life, Holmes fondly recalled to Amerson his adventures in England, which never occurred.

viernes, 9 de mayo de 2008

DEDICADO A SANTI: LA PIJA DEL LEFAZO EN EL PELO

Recordemos uno de los momentos más bochornosos de la historia de la tele, en ese programa que tanto le gusta a Santi ("Callejeros"). Lo más ridículo es la tía soplando hacia adentro en el alcoholimetro, y luego la "explicación" sobre el extraño "tocado" de su peinado. Santi, te prometí carroña, y como te gusta mucho este programa y las niñas pijas, ahí tienes, 2 en 1. O sea.

jueves, 8 de mayo de 2008

TRAVESURAS DE LA NIÑA MALA

No sé si vosotros sois muy lectores, pero por si acaso voy a hablar un poquito de este libro que me leí la semana pasada. El placer de la lectura es uno de los mayores que conozco, sobre todo cuando das con un libro apasionante. Es como meterte dentro de una película y desarrollarla tú mismo con la única arma de tu imaginación. Y lo mejor es que es un placer barato, y duradero. Cuestión aparte es lo que te aporte el libro. Hay algunos que enseñan a la vez que entretienen, hay otros muy instructivos pero que son un auténtico coñazo. Los peores son aquellos en los que el autor se esconde en una presunta superioridad intelectual para hacernos creer que no sabemos de algo, y de paso meternos un rollo patatero. Si además está mal escrito, tenemos "El Código Da Vinci", lo que yo llamaría papel higiénico caro.


Es lógico que, el que quiera acercarse al vicio de la lectura, comience a hacerlo con ese tipo de novelas. Pero hay otros autores igualmente entretenidos y bastante mejores. Así, por nombrar alguno, Agatha Chirstie, Vazquez Montalbán, Eduardo Mendoza o Ken Follet. Best-sellers de calidad, sin duda. Es impresicidible leerse al menos una vez en la vida libros de estos y muchos más autores. Si alguien quiere, le dejo una lista con lecturas recomendables, todas ellas me han hecho pasar horas y horas de DIVERSIÓN. No sé cuantos libros habré leido en mi vida, imagino que más o menos 300 ó 400. No son muchos, para lo que me hubiera gustado abarcar. Cuando no estaba enganchado a internet y a las series de TV leía muuucho más que ahora. Recuerdo que leía al menos un libro por semana. Desde muy jovencito. Ahora apenas leo 10 libros al año. aprovecho las vacaciones para metermelo todo de golpe.


Bueno, vamos al tema. "Travesuras de la niña mala". Autor, Mario Vargas Llosa. Un pedazo de escritor, Premio Cervantes. Casi todos sus libros son una pasada. Suelen retratar a la pija sociedad peruana de los años 50, la vida política de ese país, todo ello adornado siempre con historias de amores imposibles o al menos complicados. Este libro creo que es el penúltimo que ha escrito. Está de puta madre, amigos. Trata de un chaval que se enamora de una tía que, a parte de estar buena, es un tormento, una femme fatal manipuladora y bruja como ella sola. No desvelaré más por si alguien quiere leerlo. Sólo decir que es adictivo, yo me leí las 400 páginas en dos días. Y decir también que tiene MUCHO MUCHO SEXO. Y bastante guarrete, por cierto. Pero también es un libro que te ayuda a comprender la evolución de la sociedad durante 40 años, desde el Perú donde vive el joven protagonista, hasta el Madrid donde acaba sus dias en la década de los 80, pasando por París, Tokyo y Londres. En fin, que os lo recomiendo encarecidamente. Lo podeis encontrar en edición de bolsillo por 9 euros más o menos, en cualquier librería. O si no, me lo pedís prestado, cuando Magda (que va por la mitad) se lo termine.

Besos.

HIGUITOS 1998 (creo...)

La verdad es que no tengo muy claro el año...me da miedo pensar que ya hace 10 años de esta foto! Se nos ve ya más mayorcetes. Y lo que también llama la anteción es la incorporación de Lolo y Magda. En esta foto no salen Santi ni Sonia, recuerdo que ese día no estaban. Era ya uno de esos veranos en los que empezábamos a coincidir menos. Me hace gracia que sale por detrás la camarera-azafata del 1,2,3...vaya look! Y fijaos en mis piernas...parecen las de Etoo...ay que vida aquella, todo el día tirado tomando el sol!!

lunes, 5 de mayo de 2008

EL COCODRILO DE DESERT SPRINGS

Bueno, acabo de volver de las vacaciones, que han resultado geniales, ya os contaré con más detenimiento. De momento os dejo aquí la sugerencia gastronómica de la semana. Estuvimos estos últimos días en Vera (Almería), donde tenemos grandes amigos (Jose y Carmina, dos maravillosas personas que espero que algún día conozcáis) que conocen de nuestro gusto culinario. Nos llevaron, entre otros sitios, a una de las lujosas urbanizaciones privadas con campo de golf que proliferan por la Costa de Almería.



Desert Springs es probablemente la más "chic" de todas, con un grandísimo campo de golf y numerosos restaurantes de alta cocina. Como nuestro persupuesto no daba para tanto, fuimos a uno algo más normalito, aunque también muy bueno. Se trata del CROCODILE CLUB, y es un sitio precioso, una especie de gran tienda tipo africano, rodeada de jardines, terrazas, zonas chill-out, etcétera. Incluso si queréis algún día pasaros, los que tenéis niños lo tendréis facil, ya que está rodeado de jardines e incluso tiene piscina en verano. La comida está muy bien, tirando a lo mejicano y las carnes a la brasa. Comimos una hermosa fuente con delicias mejicanas, las mejores que he comido nunca, con unos jalapeños rebozados que quitaban el sentido. Para los platos principales hay muchas opciones, pero lo mejor desde luego son las carnes, y en especial el jarrete de cordero al horno, que estaba delicioso. Los platos son gigantes, haceros la idea de que yo me dejé casi la mitad, no podía más!! El precio, con bebidas varias, entradas compartidas y el plato principal, unos 30 euros por persona. Así que ya sabéis los golferos, si alguna vez caéis por esa zona, ya sabéis de un buen sitio. Os dejo aquí unas fotos de la urbanización, esto es deformación profesional, son casones tipo colonial, con colores pastel, y rodeadas de vegetación desértica, sobre todo cactus.

HALA MADRID!!

Lo siento por algunos de vosotros, pero esto es lo primero que voy a poner hoy en el blog...